I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
