Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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