I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Randomize
