I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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