called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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