I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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