actually, I'm a sock model
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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