Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
