You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
