my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
