So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
pop tarts are not kleenex
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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