he shaved USA in his pubs
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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