Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
My breasts were aching with rage.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
