she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize