I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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