Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
