so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
