I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
