What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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