Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Houston, we have a blender
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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