I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
