She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
