So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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