I can't breathe out the right side of my face
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
