her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
