i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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