i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
