It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
