worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
she looked like the before picture.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
