watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
