I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
