I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
