Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I am mentally ready for anal.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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