We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
