when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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