i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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