ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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