I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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