He disabled his match.com account in front of me
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
