Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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