yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize