If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
