IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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