She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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