Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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