come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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