Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
