I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Randomize
