Buhtt sex?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I could fuck to npr.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
