I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
